Calling to order the first meeting of Sh*t Eaters Anonymous

Hullo, my naym is Buddy an' I iz a sh*t eetur.  Iz been 2 howers sins my last snakkies on da poo.  ::Hi Buddy::  Mom sed dis most delektabul treet iz not reely treet at all, iz most diskusting an' I bettur kwit.  Dis is why I joyn S.E.A.  I must brayk dis habit.  Furst step of S.E.A.

1.  We admit that we are powerless over sh*t - that our lives have become unmaneageable.

Well, dis is not all da way tru, see I liyks to eet da poo.  Da only stuffs wut is bettur is cheez.  Iz mom dat haz dis ishu.  Her iz alway say "Damnit Buddy, NO!"  "Buddy leave it."  Buddyyyyyyyyy - eh eh eh."  "Drop.  Drooooop. DROP IT!"

MMMMM, poo!!!

Harumph, I wud liyk to seed her drop a stayk or lobstur if I wud yelled at her.  No way, no how.  My liyk of da poo iz not unmanujibul eever.  I iz veree pickee on dis doodoo dat I chewchew. But ok mom, cuz I luv you - I will pawndur dis. 

Wut do you meen der is 12 steps????  Jeez.  Kin you not jus tayked my word?  Oh, rite - I sed I wud kwit eeted da poo before huh?  Ok, 11 more steps. We wud worked on wun step eech week until my deeziyr for poo is no more.  Dat iz most you kin asked of me, mom!

So, dis meeting of S.E.A. wud be tayk plays evury Friesday until I haz compleet all da steps and iz eet no more poo from da yard.  You, my bloggy frends, iz welkom to be membur if you wanted, but if you wud liyk to keep dem reefiyn tastes of da poo and no stop - trusted me, I gits it.

Are you a sh*t eater?  Well, are ya?

Also, last stuff for you wut is - - mom is leeve for SeeSiyd, Origun wen da sun comes up agin.  Sins she wud be goned we won't haz menne story of my advenchurs.  So we iz gonna do a "Ask Buddy Anything"!  You cud ask me (or my brudder dawg) kweshtuns abowt us and our life togever, or abowt trayning, or abowt bliyndees, or abowt why da sky is blew.  Wut ever you do wanted.  I wud answered dem kewshtuns all next week until mom getted home.

Kisses & Snuggles,
Buddy Dawg